Volume VI:   05/97

Introduction: May Issue Released in May - Film at 11
Editorial: Why Can't We All Get Along?
Article: How the Undernet Has Affected My Life
Article: #IRCastle Takes You Back to Medieval Times
Article: Help Channels on the Undernet: Part 2 of 2
News: What Every Op Should Know: The Updated X/W FAQ
Article: Back By Popular Demand - Igor Ogg: IRC Operator


Introduction
by bethie

Although it's only been a couple of weeks since the April issue was released, we have a jam-packed May issue which we think you'll enjoy just as much. Get ready for a provocative editorial by guest columnist TrikkyT, who will be discussing issues of importance to all the Undernet community in his own candid style. The Undernet Channel Service has released the new X/W FAQ - a must-read for all channel operators. And you won't want to miss the next installment of "Igor Ogg: IRC Operator."

I'd also like to take this opportunity to thank all the people that contributed to this issue, with special thanks to ^patrick^, who created our new logo. If you like what you see here, or if you don't and want to tell us why, take a moment and complete our feedback form located at the Undernet Public Relations Committee website at http://www.pr-com.undernet.org.


Why Can't We All Get Along?
by TrikkyT

Infighting: This behaviour has been the downfall of many great civilizations throughout history. Could the Undernet could be next?

It seems that some members of the different committees take criticism of their 'department' to heart, without looking seriously at the value of such criticism. Instead of working on or discussing the criticism and any solutions, some committee members often choose to go on their merry way, often to the detriment of the Undernet.

Each committee, be it Public Relations, Channel Service or any other, has its individual responsibilities. They also have a responsibility to support and assist each other to ensure that the final product - the Undernet - is the best that it can be.

Constructive criticism is an important tool in any organisation. Without it, we will be ignorant of our weak points, blinded to the need for improvement. With it we can grow, advancing the greater cause - the IRC network in which we all have a stake.

We should not lower ourselves to taking criticism personally and responding with abusive or insulting posts. We should be willing to take a step back, looking at any comments in an objective manner and responding accordingly.

We must put the betterment of the Undernet first and ask ourselves "How can I resolve this problem?" Talking from experience, I know firsthand how annoying it is to point out an area in which I see a problem, only to have a member of another committee insult me for daring to criticise. If only that member took the time to read what I had said, before responding with such bitterness.

Those that refuse to accept outside suggestions should be removedimmediately from any and all committees or projects on which they are involved. They should be removed because it is blatantly obvious that they lack flexibility and an important openness to suggestions. First and foremost, however, they should be removed because they lack the betterment of the Undernet as their primary concern.

Undernet committees are not individual power trips. Nor are they private domains for a select few. The Undernet wants to have the best and most able bodies in the positions. Senior members of each committee should not be afraid to replace committee members if they are unwilling to put the Undernet first.

Most importantly, each committee must learn to work with the others,ensuring that users, not egos, are our prime concern.

Yours in chatting,
TrikkyT


EDITOR'S NOTE: The opinions expressed in this article are solely those of the author and do not necessarily represent those of the Undernet IRC network, UnderCurrents, or any other member of the Undernet Public Relations Committee.


Next Issue: Bots, Clones and Idles. Should we take firmer action?


How the Undernet Has Affected My Life
by cpw

It's hard to believe that it's been a year. One year ago, I came across this thing called IRC. I didn't have any idea what it was, how to use it, or anything about it. So I decided to try it out. I downloaded this program called
mIRC (I thought the name was weird from the beginning), hoping that it wouldn't dump a virus into my system, and installed it. Now at this point in time, I had been "connected" for about 6 months, going through a local ISP. I was spending about 50 hours a month online, not quite knowing what I was doing. Then came IRC - I really didn't know what I was doing there.

I poked around on the browser for a while, trying to figure out what all the cool little buttons did, and finally found myself in a small channel talking to a really nice person. It was that user-friendly environment that made me decide to stick around. I have been constantly learning every second that I have been online, and have made many friends and met many wonderful people (including my wonderful girlfriend) online. Stop by #Teenbeachhouse any time if you want to meet some of the great people. I am one of the ops there, and we try to make it as much of a user-friendly environment as possible.

Recently, I have become involved more in the helping-aspect of the Undernet. The #Class project is a great resource for all new users, and teaches them the basics of IRC, helping them enjoy the Undernet more fully. I have also become involved in the Usenet (newsgroup) postings for the Undernet. We are trying to make the network more visible through advertisements in newsgroups for special events online.

The Undernet Public Relations Committee is perhaps one of the most important groups on the network. Without publicity for events, online activities or news for users, the Undernet would not be the popular network it is today. Our goal is to educate the users and keep them informed of eventspertaining to the Undernet, so that all may enjoy the many possibilities the network has to offer.


#IRCastle
by Dr_Seuss

The #IRCastle is located just a short distance from reality on the road to the CyberWorld. It can be reached easily anytime you find yourself wandering the Undernet in the land of IRC. It is set back into the hills,and the moat is fed by a wandering brook that flows nearby. Now that spring is here, the sun streams through the windows by day, and a warm fire glows every night.

The drawbridge is always open, welcoming weary travelers, but guests are required to leave their weapons at the door. Hospitality is offered to all who enter. The honored guests and regular inhabitants vary widely in interests, age and place of origin. Only a few rules are enforced to ensure the comfort of those present.

The rooms inside the castle are many, but it is easy to find someone willingto show you around - from the great meeting room, just inside the mainhall, where the barkeep will serve you your favorite ale - to the rooms found at the ends of halls and winding stairways, where folk are seen entering and leaving very quietly, and at strange hours. The large kitchen is a favorite visiting place of guests, as is the dungeon, providing the dragon has been fed.

Merriment and laughter can be heard as soon as you step foot inside the castle. It is known throughout the land as an enjoyable place, where friends are made and hearts are warmed. The King Ozmodious and Rain, hisQueen, rule with a gentle hand and urge their Wizards, Lords and Ladies, and Knights to do likewise, so that all will feel at home.

More can be learned about the #IRCastle, its laws, the Royal Court, and those who are often found there by just dropping by and visiting, or you can stop by and visit our website.


Help Channels on the Undernet: Part 2 of 2
by Xarion

#mIRC
Here you can get help on how to use mIRC, or how to get mIRC. They'll help you if mIRC isn't doing what you want it to do. The topic states where you can get versions and FAQs on mIRC, and usually they'll have a bot that gives you information when you join. Most of all, #mIRC is for people who have questions about mIRC! NOTE: mIRC is for Windows systems, and more information can be found at
http://www.mirc.co.uk.

#ircII
Usually in here the topic tells you where to get scripts for ircII or where to get ircII. You can go in there for help on ircII or how to use ircII. ircII is for unix systems, and you can get it at ftp://ftp.undernet.org/pub/irc/clients/unix.

#Ircle
Ircle, the IRC client for the Macintosh computer, is also a great channel to receive help on things such as where to get ircle, how to work ircle, problems with ircle, and all around stuff to do with ircle! http://www.xs4all.nl/~ircle/ is the place to go to get this client.

#Pirch
Pirch is for people who use Windows but don't like mIRC, or just like Pirch better. Pirch is a very user-friendly IRC client. Usually in the channel, the topic will state where to get Pirch and a FAQ on it. In the channel, you can ask for help on any topics for Pirch. Pirch can be found at http://www.bcpl.lib.md.us/~frappa/pirch.html.

NOTE: All of these IRC chat clients can be found at ftp://ftp.undernet.org/pub/ irc/clients.

#Herbal_Oasis
This channel is where you can go to "rent" bots. These bots will help you hold your channel and prevent takeover attempts. Their botnet is very stable and will help you have a peaceful time on IRC. You can get a bot in your channel by going to their website. Soon #Herbal_Oasis will be using a perl bot, coded by Uhh_Duh.

#ZT (Zero Tolerance)
This channel, with IRC Operators helping in it, is a very big help to the Undernet. It's a channel where the ops are willing to help, and the users get the help they need with such channel-related problems as takeovers, opless channels, or desynched channels. It is always set to +mtn, so that you don't get any annoyances that are not needed - strictly a help channel!

#Class
This channel is a very big benefit to the Undernet. With already lots of successful classes, users have shown how much they appreciated the efforts and the help this channel has given new users. In this channel, the teacher runs a script, while there are tutors for certain lettered nicknames; i.e., A-GTutor helps users whose nicknames start with A-G, and so on. If you are new to IRC, or know someone who is, this channel holds their classes every Tuesday night at 8:00 PM EDT (12:00 AM GMT). Check it out when you get a chance! You can visit the #Class project's webpage at http://www.pr-com.undernet.org/class.

#OpSchool
This channel is part of a very successful project run by CService that helps people who are new to X/W, the channel bots provided by the Undernet Channel Service. It tells the basic commands for X/W as well as information on CService Admins, Helpers, etc. #OpSchool runs very much like #Class (Tutors, someone who runs the script, etc.) To find out when the next #Opschool is scheduled, type /msg Underbot motd, ask in #CService, or write to either cservice@undernet.org or opschool@undernet.org. You can also visit the #OpSchool website at http://www.wildstar.net/~opschool for more information.

#CService
This is the official X/W, or Undernet Channel Service help channel. The team of CService Helpers/Admins is very professional. They will help you with any questions you have about the Channel Service, and if you have problems with X/W in your channel, they can help you too. Check out the CService webpage at http://cservice.undernet.org.

#PC
Here you can get help for your personal computer. It's a technical help channel where you can go if you're having problems with your PC. Make sure to drop by there before sending your computer off to the shop. You never know - it may save you lots of cash!

#ICMP
Since ICMP attacks and Denial of Service attacks have been rather popular these last few weeks, the channel #icmp and the mailing list icmp@undernet.org have been created to help users deal with such attacks, helping them detect, protect themselves and report such attacks. If you have any information that could help them in that matter or any question you'd like to ask, please e-mail the mailing list. To subscribe to the list, just send an e-mail to icmp-request@undernet.org with 'subscribe' in the subject heading. Note that they do not in any way discuss methods for causing such an attack. They're the good guys!

#Techhelp
#Techhelp is a brand new channel created for users to ask technical questions about the Internet, IRC servers and how they work, and how to create better network security. Please note, however, that this is not a channel for newbies, but rather for more sophisticated kinds of questions. They are in the process of creating a website also.


The Updated Channel Operator's FAQ
by the Undernet Channel Service

This FAQ has been put together by the Undernet Channel Service Committee for any and all users who have Channel Operator status on a registered channel on the Undernet.

1)  What is the Undernet Channel Service Committee?

The Undernet Channel Service Committee (CSC) operates under the auspices of the Undernet Administrators. Just as all other aspects of Undernet, please keep in mind that the CSC is run by volunteers, in their spare time. This is not a paid, full-time job for anyone. If you need assistance with CService, we ask that you mail
cservice@undernet.org or go to #CService. If your problem is one that requires an Admin's help, then an Admin will be found for you. Remember, the Admins are on IRC to relax and have fun themselves, which is why we have Helpers who are available on #CService to answer questions for you.

2)  Who are X and W?

X and W are the two Channel Service (CService) bots. They reside on the Undernet's registered channels. Each registered channel has either X or W, but not both. They are exactly the same in the functions they can perform. The bots hold separate user lists for each channel they reside on. These lists are maintained by the Channel Manager for each channel.

3)  Who is the Channel Manager?

The Channel Manager is the person who registered the channel. There is generally only one Channel Manager, unless a special arrangement has been made with CService to have more than one. The Channel Manager makes the decisions on how the channel is to be run. This is the person you should go to if you have a problem on your channel.

To find out who the Channel Manager is, type /msg X chaninfo #channel or /msg w chaninfo #channel, depending on which bot resides on that particular channel.

4)  What is a Channel Operator?

A Channel Operator (ChanOp) is a user who has been given operator status on a particular channel. There are 2 types of ChanOps on a registered channel: those with access to X/W, and those without access to X/W. The channel manager decides who shall gain access to X/W on his/her channel. The channel manager may also delegate this responsibility to one or more 400+ level users (see explanation of levels below).

Regardless of whether or not you actually have access to X/W as a ChanOp, you have still been given the privilege of helping the Channel Manager maintain the channel. You will be expected to abide by all of the Channel Manager's rules, as well as CService's rules.

5)  How do I know if I can op someone who doesn't have access to X?

Each Channel Manager makes his/her own rules for things such as this, so be sure to consult the Manager first if you are unsure of the rules.

Keep in mind that it is not a good idea to give ops to just anyone on the channel, though, since as an operator they have the ability to kick and ban anyone off the channel, including you. If you are going to give someone ops, make sure you know you can trust them and make sure they know both the Channel Manager's rules and CService's rules.

The only time that you will not physically be able to give ops to someone who does not have access to X is if the Channel Manager has placed the channel in StrictOp mode.

6)  What is StrictOp mode?

StrictOp mode means that only users who have access to X's userlist can have ops on the channel. If you try to op someone that X doesn't recognize from the userlist, then X will deop this person.

7)  What are the responsibilities of a ChanOp?

A ChanOp is responsible for helping to maintain the atmosphere that the Channel Manager has set for his/her channel. This means ensuring that all users abide by the set channel rules and warning or removing users who do not abide by them.

8)  How do I know who has access to X/W?

You can find out if someone is on the user list for a channel by typing /msg X access #channel nickname. If the person is on the list for that channel, you will get a notice which looks like this:

-X- USER: teal (*!*erf103@*.psu.edu) ACCESS: 450 LMPU
-X- CHANNEL: #Help -- AUTOOP: ON
-X- LAST SEEN: 10 days, 19:42:16 ago

Line 1: nickname, user@host mask, access level and access flags
Line 2: channel name, autoop setting, protect setting
Line 3: how long ago user was last seen on the channel

9)  How do I get added to a channel's user list?

Only ChanOps with ACCESS level 400 or higher can add users to the channel's user list. Who gets added is usually determined by the Channel Manager. Some channels may have a recommendation/voting process to add new ChanOps. The best bet is to find out what that channel's procedure is by asking someone who is a ChanOp on that channel.

10)  What is this ACCESS level thing?

A user's level determines what commands the user has access to on X or W. Users will have access to the commands for their level, plus all commands for any levels below them. For example, a level 75 user will have access to ban and unban, plus the level 50 and level 0 commands.

To find out what commands you have access to on a particular channel, type /msg X showcommands #channelname.

Here are the commands for the all the different levels:

Level 500:   set
Level 450:   addchan join part remchan
Level 400:   adduser clearmode modinfo remuser status
Level 100:   deop invite op suspend unsuspend
Level 75:     ban unban
Level 50:     kick topic
Level 0:       access banlist chaninfo deauth help lbanlist map motd
                     newpass pass showcommands showignore verify
The "set" command has a few different variables that can be set. NoOp, OpOnly, StrictOp, FloodPro & Lang are all level 500 only. However, NickFloodPro, MassDeopPro, AlwaysOp, UserFlags, Description, and URL are all level 450 and above.

Level 500:  Channel Manager. (MUST login once every 21 days)

Levels 450 & 400    Trusted Administrators. These are ChanOps that the Channel Manager has allowed to help with administrative duties on the channel.

Level 100:  These ChanOps can command X to perform all regular ChanOp commands, including some special X/W commands.

Levels 75 & 50:  These ChanOps can command X to perform most regular ChanOp commands (see above list) as well as some special ones.

Level 0:  All users who are not on the bot's user list for that channel. Also, any ChanOp who has a password set but has not yet been authenticated (by messaging the bot with his/her password) will be seen as a Level 0 user.

Keep in mind that users do not have to have the above values as their levels. For instance, a user could have level 358. This level would mean that the user has all commands for the levels under 358 (100, 75, 50, and 0). Then, say for instance, a user has level 401. This would mean that the user has access to commands at levels 400 and under. Keep in mind that this user can now modify the information of any 400 or lower level user (since modinfo is a 400 level command).

NOTE: For "regular" ChanOp commands (i.e., kick, ban, unban, op, deop) these levels just allow for the ChanOp to command the bot to do them. Regardless of the ChanOp's level, these commands can still be performed manually by the ChanOp. For example, a level 100 ChanOp can op another user either by typing /msg X op #channel nickname or /mode #channel +o nickname. A level 50 or level 75 ChanOp can op another user by typing /mode #channel +o nickname, but cannot use X to op a user as the level 100 can.

12)  What is AUTOOP?

When AUTOOP is set to ON, you will be automatically opped by X upon entering the channel. If you have a password set though, then AUTOOP will only work if you /msg X with your password before you enter the channel.

If AUTOOP is set to OFF, you will need to type /msg X op #channel yournick for X to op you. Again, if you have a password set, you will need to /msg X with your password before you ask it to op you.

13)  What is this "LMPU" thing next to my access?

These are access flags. They show various details about your access listing. They have the following meanings:

L - Access is loaded in X/W's memory
M - Access has been modified since X/W's database was last saved.
Note: logging in modifies your access via the "Last Seen" field.
P - Access has a password
U - Access is in use by user.

Most users will only be interested in the "P" and "U" flags, as the other two really don't affect users in any way.

14)  Why would I use a password and how do I set one?

A password gives more protection against someone faking your user@host and obtaining ops. If you have a password set, X/W will only recognize you if you have the correct user@host and give the correct password.

To set your password for the first time:

/msg x@channels.undernet.org newpass #channel yourpassword
/msg w@channels2.undernet.org newpass #channel yourpassword

To change your password, first identify yourself:

/msg x@channels.undernet.org pass #channel currentpassword
/msg w@channels2.undernet.org pass #channel currentpassword

Then change it:

/msg x@channels.undernet.org newpass #channel newpassword
/msg w@channels2.undernet.org newpass #channel newpassword

Some notes to remember:

  • Once you have sent your password to X once, it will remember who you are until you sign off. Also, if you get caught on the opposite side of a netsplit from X, it will consider you as having signed off and it will forget who you are until you /msg your password again.

  • Passwords are now required. X and W will only recognize you at command level 0 until you have set a password. This means that you will not be able to access all commands your userlevel may allow.

  • x@channels.undernet.org and w@channels2.undernet.org are only needed when sending a newpass or a pass command. This was done to ensure that as long as you use the proper command, you will always be sure it is the real X or W when sending your password.

  • If you IRC from a site with a lot of users, e.g., a university or a large Internet Service Provider, it is wise to have a password to guard against other people imitating you and causing problems on your channel and with X/W and CService.

    15)  What happens if I can't remember my password?

    Your password will have to be reset by any 400 or higher level ChanOp on your channel. Speak to one of them. You can find out who these are by typing /msg X access #channel -min 400. If you are the Channel Manager, then you will have to get a CService Admin to reset it for you. Ask in #CService for xhost.frm and e-mail it in the body of the e-mail to x@undernet.org or w@undernet.org, depending on which your channel is registered on.

    16)  Why can't I deop or kick X and W?

    New code added to the servers has made it impossible to deop or kick X and W now. No one should attempt to kick X and W anyway.

    17)  So how can I make X or W leave the channel if I can't kick them?

    Level 450 and higher ops can use the "part" command to have X or W leave the channel. This is done by typing /msg X part #channel.

    18)  What exactly does CService consider abuse?

    Well, since X and W can no longer be deopped or kicked, we hope there will no longer be any abuse of CService. However, CService still considers certain other actions to be abusive of either the bots or of the privilege of having the service.

  • Floods: Flooding X and W is considered abuse. Continual flooding by anyone on IRC, whether you are an op on a registered channel or not, can result in you being reported to an IRC Operator, and letting them handle the situation however they see fit (usually a /kill and/or a K: line or G: line (ban) from the Undernet servers).

    Accidental floods do happen. If X/W are not responding to you immediately, please send a ctcp ping to the CService bot and await a response. If you do not get any response, please go to #CService to report this and find out what is happening.

  • Clone bots. Any Channel Manager found running clone bots on IRC will end up with his/her channel being purged. The privilege of CService is granted with the assumption that the Channel Manager will be trustworthy and conscientious of CService's and the Undernet's rules. Running clone bots is against Undernet policy and considered abuse of the IRC network. This type of abuse will result in CService considering you an "unfit" channel manager.

  • Warez. CService has a strict policy against registering warez channels. Registered channels found being used as warez channels will be purged.

    Besides the above, keep this in mind: Anything that puts an unnecessary load on X/W or on the servers is considered abuse of the service and of your privileges.

    Users of the channel violating any of the above guidelines can have their access suspended and/or be banned from the channel by CService Admins. The situation will then be reported to the Channel Manager for disciplinary action.

    19)  What is NoOp mode?

    NoOp mode means that no one except X will be able to have ops on the channel and all kicks/bans must be done through X. Here is where the access level really determines what commands a user can perform.

    20)  Where can I get more information about X/W and CService?

    On IRC:

  • X/W:    You can type /msg X help for help with commands.

  • #CService:    There are always Helpers and/or Admins here to help.

  • UnderBot:    You can DCC documents from here. To find out what documents are available, type /msg Underbot files. To DCC a file from UnderBot, type /msg Underbot get (filename).

  • #Opschool:    A class is held here every few days to teach about the Channel Service. For more info, ask in #CService or mail opschool@undernet.org.

    Off IRC:

  • All CService documents can be obtained from ftp://ftp.undernet.org/pub/irc/docs/cservice.

  • The web interface to W and X is located at http://cservice.undernet.org. You can use these to view a channel's banlist and userlist. You can also use these to see if someone is currently online! These pages also have links to all of the CService documents.

  • Both x@undernet.org and w@undernet.org are mailing lists for manager requests such as user@host changes, purges, manager changes, etc.

  • xform@undernet.org is the mailing list for registration requests, while opschool@undernet.org is the mailing list for #Opschool info. If you can't find someone online to help, you can email cservice@undernet.org (a public mailing list) and someone will respond via e-mail. General Undernet help can be obtained from help@undernet.org.

    NOTE:    Do not send any personal/confidential information (i.e., your password) to ANY of the lists. If you have something confidential that you need to discuss with CService, please contact a senior level Admin directly.

    21)  Who are the Channel Service Administrators?

    The Channel Service Administrators are users who have administrative access to the Channel Service bots. The CService Admins are volunteers who are committed to making sure the Channel Service is used as it was created to and that the Channel Service is not abused. CService Admins represent the Undernet Channel Service as well as the Undernet as a whole. You can get an up-to-date listing of the CService admins at http://cservice.undernet.org/people.

    This FAQ was written by Teal and was updated by Mike- as of 24 May 1997.


    Diary of Igor Ogg: IRC Operator

    08:30

    I wake up in my chair to the sound of my colleagues arriving at work. In front of me, my e-mail client glares smugly with 14 new messages. As the previous night's events dawn on me, I realise I only have 3 options. I could deny everything and blame it on a colleague of mine who decided to cause mischief on my computer, I could post an immediate retraction of my previous e-mail and apologise profusely, or alternatively, I could resign and cowardly hide from the Internet from behind my desk. I risk a glance at the mails.


    From: runner@alias.undernet.org
    To: IgorO@alias.undernet.org
    CC: admins@undernet.org, wastelanders@undernet.org
    Subject: Re: [admins] Alleged "IRCop" Saren must go NOW!

    >REMOVE SAREN'S O: LINE RIGHT NOW! HE GLINED MY ENTIRE DOMAIN AND I'M
    >AN IRCOP AND I DESERVE BETTER THAN THAT. ALL THESE HOURS I'VE SPENT
    >SELFLESSLY WORKING FOR THE UNDERNET AND THEN SOME NEWBIE IRCOP COMES
    >ALONG AND GLINES ME GET RID OF HIM NOW!!!!

    >Yours,

    I Totally Agree! Said O: line has been removed and to set an example,
    the oper has been G-lined himself!

    Please accept my apologies.

    Runner
    Admin of Houghton.NL.EU.Undernet.org

    I gasp in horror at the posts all supporting Runner's actions and the further posts about "cleaning up the Undernet." Option 4 of turning into a self-righteous renegade of the peace comes into play. I decide to run out for breakfast before the day changes for the worse.

    12:30
    After eating dinner I decide to risk logging onto IRC. It seems very calm and I haven't been messaged for the 9 minutes I have been logged on. I decide to go into #wasteland to show a brave face.

    I am immediately messaged.

    Msg from: *the_GeNr8* hey, are you an ircop?
    Msg to: *the_GeNr8* yes, Sir :)
    Msg from: *the_GeNr8* is ther anyway i can get my nik back,
    i've been using it for 3 years and some guy stole it
    Msg to: *the_GeNr8* have you tried asking for it?
    Msg from: *the_GeNr8* no, do you think that would work?

    Nothing seems to have changed. All in all, it seems unusually peaceful. I begin to believe that I may have survived a very close call perfectly intact, so I start going about my normal IRC business of talking about nothing much and helping the occasional luser.

    20:30
    I arrive home late, which isn't surprising really, since my mobile phone keeps ringing every 10 seconds with people asking if I can help them install Windows. Eventually I bring myself round to the personal hygiene thing. Just enough time to check that the server is up and running before I hit the sack.

    20:50
    As I log on I suddenly realise that something is not right. On connecting I instantly get about 8 messages.

    Msg From: *Bob* HEY!! I NEED HELP!
    Msg From: *Cluey* Helooo???????
    Msg From: *CoLlIo* Help me puleasssse
    Msg From: *arr* Someone Has taken my channel!!!!?!!!?!?!
    Msg From: *BobUK* Hey! I want you to fix my channel or I
    will call my lawyer!
    Msg From: *SexYGrl* Do you want to be my friend?
    Msg From: *klipto* Where have all the channels gone?
    Msg From: *Spyros* have you seen Bob?

    I do a quick scan of the network. All the servers seem to be connected, and the amount of users online seems about right. I try to join #wasteland.

    *** #wasteland :Cannot join channel (+i) (You must be invited)

    Hmmmm, I think, as I try other channels.
    *** #Help :Cannot join channel (+i) (You must be invited)
    *** #cservice :Cannot join channel (+i) (You must be invited)
    *** #zt :Cannot join channel (+i) (You must be invited)
    *** #secret-oper-channel :Cannot join channel (+i) (You must be invited)

    I seek help from my fellow Operators.

    !IgorO*! Anyone noticed anything strange going on?
    !litte*! not really, is there anything in particular?
    !Great*! well, not really, me neither, but I wouldn't know
    since all my channels seem to be +i
    !Edgey*! Strange, I have the same problem as Great!
    !litte*" quick someone get an IRC Operator!
    !Great*! hang on, isn't that us?

    I notice very quickly that my colleagues will be of little help. Carefully thinking about the situation, I form a plan of attack. I notice that the oper services bot and the channel services bot have been removed. This can mean only one thing!

    We are Under Siege!

    21:30
    I contemplate a cunning plan and finally come up with a solution:

    Notice to $*.org Dear Undernet Users: have no fear, for justice is about to take its course. Simply msg me the names of the Evil-Doers and I shall hastily smite them!

    I wait..

    Msg From: *Bubba* Hello do you want to chat?
    Msg From: *Zerbey* heheheh, smite, I like that, hehehe
    Msg From: *bethie* how are you talking in my status window?
    Msg From: *Darky* It is George!bozo@help.ihavenoclue.org
    Msg From: *RatBoy* Please type !Ratpix to access my fserve
    Msg From: *Glenda* Hi Can I be an IRC Cop so I can smite people too?

    I quickly deduce that it really is George!

    George is bozo@help.ihavenoclue.org (Undernet Takeover Bot)
    on channels: @#Wasteland @#Cservice @#help @#Secret-oper-channel
    @#30+FriendsNFlirting @#30+CyberFun @#30+Cyberfriends @#30+4play
    @#30's_corner_bar @#30&OBSESSED @#3-rivieres @#2ndHome @#2nd-world
    @#2600 @#25plus @#25+fun @#24hrtalk @#21+happyhour @#21+mental
    @#20plus @#1sexpics @#1Nicki'sCorner @#18ans+ @#18andup
    @#18-27College @#17-25singles*chat* @#17-21 @#16-23

    on channels: @#16-19_teenflirt @#16-19teenz @#16-18TeenZ
    @#1525friendly @#15-21 @#14-16teenpals @#13-21 @#13-20
    @#13-19teenz @#13-19teen @#13-18 @#13-17teenz @#13-15teenz
    @#13-15teen2 @#13-15 @#12/13yearolds @#12-16teens @#12-16teen
    @#12-15teenz @#1119teenz @#11-19flirts @#101%adultsexpics
    @#100_all_xxx_pics @#100%skaters @#100%seXXX @#100%HomeMadeNudies
    @#100%Adult.Chat @#10-17regs @#1-stop @#1-hot-xxx-pics
    George using Bumrocket.TX.US.Undernet.org (The Bumrocket IRC Server)
    George has been idle 37 minutes 5 secondsų

    Aha! I quickly keep my promise and blast the fatal blow!

    [Killed] George (IgorO(Undernet Takeover))

    !IgorO*! Have no fear people -- the Evil Tyranny has been brought
    to an end!
    !Edgey*! urgh, stay off the drugs man..

    22:00
    I log off in the knowledge that all is well for the moment.

    TO (PERHAPS) BE CONTINUED...


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